International Women’s Day was yesterday, but Courtney Martin over at The American Prospect wants to remind us remind us that women aren’t doing all that great domestically, either.
Martin believes that while International Women’s Day is valuable – since one would find it difficult to argue that women abroad couldn’t stand to benefit from some feminist successes – it also helps obscure the fact that women are not yet equal in our own country. She believes that it allows American feminists to take a relatively “guiltless” look at existing patriarchal structures, since we’re critiquing, say, maternal mortality in Sudan, or divorce laws in Egypt. We can argue for hours about whether women who choose to veil themselves are making an empowering choice, or whether they are, at best, simply victims of false consciousness, or worse, coerced. We are freed from having to look at our contributions to the kyriarchy.
Martin explains it better than I can:
Not only are we released from examining the ways in which sexism still affects us, we don’t have to get real about the ways in which our lifestyles, affluence, and networks keep inequality firmly in place for other American women.
Confronting privilege is a terribly difficult thing to do. I’ve gotten far better at it over the course of my feminist education/awareness, such that I am able to make an ignorant statement and correct myself immediately – I have called myself out on being sizeist and ablist more often than I can remember. Sometimes, I catch myself mid-phrase. Yet, I persist in making judgments and statements that are antithetical to my feminism. I refuse to feel guilty for these lapses; I know that being fully aware of one’s privileged attitudes is something that generally only occurs after a long learning process.
Reconciling the ways in which one colludes with the patriarchy with one’s feminism is also a learning process – there’s a lot of cognitive dissonance, stress, and anger. I’ve recently noticed how often I preface my statements with, “I think” or “Maybe”. I raise my voice at the end of statements to make them sound less authoritative. I’m trying to stop, but it’s hard to overcome such deeply ingrained behaviors. Martin says, and I fully agree, that “[i]t’s far more cut-and-dried to send a check to an entrepreneurial woman via Kiva.org than it is to examine your own daily practices and privilege.”
So I’d like to take a moment here to encourage readers to stop and examine the ways in which they are privileged and the ways in which they inadvertently oppress others. Being privileged in some ways doesn’t mean you aren’t in others, and admitting that you benefit from the privilege that cisgendered, able-bodied, thin, white-looking people get (I’m pointing a finger at myself here) doesn’t mean you aren’t every bit of the feminist you thought you were.
I want to also piggyback on Martin’s article and add that, in my opinion, another reason why days like today tend to obscure the fact that women are still discriminated against in the U.S. is that those who are feminist-wary* are able to contribute to a cause overseas, pat themselves on the back as being pro-woman, and continue to refuse to analyze the way the same patriarchal structures that oppress women in other countries function in the United States.
* This is what I like to mentally call the people I know who profess to hold progressive beliefs about equality for all (and who, in theory, do), but become combative, defensive, or totally shut down when confronted with examples of their own privilege, or when someone points out larger institutional or social forces that contribute to the oppression of those who are not white, able-bodied, cisgendered men. I think they just fail to realize that having privilege doesn’t make you a bad person, and benefiting from privilege doesn’t necessarily mean they aren’t qualified to be doing whatever they’re doing.